The Skinny

Said Tattoo that I want.

So lately, I have been getting back into my work out phase. I am one of those people who are skinny fat. You know, one of those people who is tiny (around a size 4, give or take a size depending on what brand I am wearing) but does not have a lot of muscle. It isn't like I am in bad shape. I mean I can hop up and run a 5k without stopping. Still, I look in the mirror and just know I want to and can look better. To give me a jolt of motivation, I was asked to be a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding and also there is a small matter of wanting to get a huge tattoo across my torso.

Said body that I want. 

In the past, I have always tried to maintain a certain weight. If I come close to 120lbs, I start freaking out. I am very petite, 5'3" with a very small frame. But no matter how low I keep my weight, I have never been able to achieve that flat stomach. This time around, I am not going to focus on weight, so much as measurements and a certain desired body type. I ended up looking at tons of female celebrities in bikinis... I admit I felt a bit like a perv, But I ended up deciding that  I want Mila Kunis' body. She is the same height, age and body type as me. Also, her body is soft and feminine, without being overly muscular or twig skinny. She looks healthy and happy.

Now, comes the work part. How exactly does one get a body like that? I typically turn to running for a work out, but the cold weather and rain and snow tends to limit when I actually can get out and run. So, I decided to turn to zumba... which is a Latin dance exercise routine craze. Of course, I I am supplementing that with some calisthenics and strength training, maybe some yoga too. I think the zumba might work for me, given that it is surprisingly challenging. After the first hour of zumba, I could already feel my abs, thighs and arms screaming in protest. But not only that, I am the whitest white girl ever and have absolutely no rhythm and so far, my hips absolutely refuse to move like that. While most people would be absolutely defeated and say this is not for me, I actually thrive on not being able to do something right. I guess it is because of my love of learning, and also when ever I have a little bit of success, I want more and end up trying harder.

Air Swimmers

Completely Awesome... I want!

Paterno Fired!

So it really saddens me that this is the first post I am making in my new blog, but I just can't get the whole situation out of my mind. For those of you that haven't kept up on what is going on at Penn State here is a brief description. Former Asst. Coach Jerry Sandusky is accused of molesting 8 minors, some of which happened on the property of Penn State. "In November 2011, Sandusky was arrested for 40 counts related to allegations of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period." (borrowed from wikipedia). This is not really what I want to talk about though because I believe that everyone is pretty much on the same page about how they feel about this. The issue that is causing me to be unable to sleep, revolves around head coach Joe Paterno and University President Spanier.  Well, I guess there should be an Ex in front of those titles.

They have both been fired by Penn States board of trustees. Now, you may be questioning why they would lose their jobs over the ordeal. Back in 2002, an undergraduate student reported to Coach Paterno that he had witnessed what appeared to be Sandusky having anal sex with a minor in the showers at the University. Paterno then reported this to the president. Instead of taking any action, the school reminded Sandusky that he wasn't allowed to bring minors onto campus. When the news hit of Paterno being let go, students practically rioted and the basic consensus is that because of Paterno's excellent football record, he deserved better than that and news sources quickly painted Paterno as a victim.

This is where my mind started turning and I just can't understand. Paterno was an authority figure and he should be held accountable for, what I like to consider, gross negligence. He is a public figure and a figure of authority and he should be held to some sort of moral standards. If the manager at MCDonalds were to be told by an employee that a Crew Trainer was participating in suspicious behavior with a minor in the stock room and did nothing... the world would want his blood. They would hold him accountable for any incidents that took place after he was notified. Since, Paterno is the "winningest" coach in College Football, should he not be held accountable. How many young boys could have been saved from this fate if he wouldn't have turned the other cheek and reported this to the law? Does American society really value a football record over the fate of innocent children.

As a parent and a rape victim, I just can't look at the situation any other way than disgust.  These boys will have emotional scars for the rest of their lives and have baggage that most adults could never amass in a lifetime. Memories that are supposed to be pure and of things like getting the gifts they wanted for Christmas, hanging out with friends, playing little league and their first kisses have been ripped from them in the most horrid of ways and replaced with nightmares. No amount of therapy, money or "justice" will ever bring them back. Joe Paterno and Stainer could have stopped it, and they didn't. And the world thinks it is unfair that they lost their jobs because Paterno is good at winning football games.

These men are disgusting, Americans should take no excuses from them, because there is not a person in this country that doesn't know that having sex with a little boy is wrong. Shame on those that try to fool themselves into thinking otherwise over the sake of a football game. Perhaps I am particularly empathetic, but I look at the face of my son and can't imagine the lengths I would go to ruin someone for hurting him like that or not protecting him when they should of. There isn't a force on the planet that could provide me with justice.

Victims are people who are hurt or wronged by no fault of their own. They are not grown men who know something that is the worst kind of wrong is taking place and ignore it when they have the power to stop it. They don't go on about their business like nothing happened. What happens in the dark always comes to light. I hope the guilt of their decisions haunt them for the rest of their lives. I hope they see the faces of the victims every time they close their eyes and they never get a restful nights sleep again in their lives.

Alas, they are convinced they have done nothing wrong and they are the victims. They lost their jobs, but I am sure they have a pretty nice severance package coming to them and will spend the rest of their lives in comfort. They might get a book deal or two and earn a pretty penny. They will appear on talk shows where the hosts sympathize with how unfair it is that they lost their jobs when they did nothing wrong and everyone will forget who the real victims. Those children and their families will suffer and mothers will have to look into the faces of their broken children and know that they won't ever have the lives they should have. The children will wish that it would all go away and their parents will wish that they can take the pain instead of having to see their children bear it. And my heart breaks for them.